Just a little more than usual
Nothing fancy, just a good meat and potatoes meal– lean pot roast, with mashed potatoes and gravy, maybe some fresh local corn off the cob, and some green beans (I can’t remember all the details– it was almost 34 years ago), probably some bread or rolls, and a tasty dessert.
I just kept shoveling it in, and eventually got sick to my stomach from eating so much. I think it was the chocolate pudding that put me over the edge. It’s the only time that’s ever happened.
Something that sufficed year-round– probably jeans, t-shirt, and either a pull-over sweatshirt or polo shirt, socks and sneakers. And maybe a hat/cap, if it’s the off day for a shower.
I’m in this weird place where I yearn for that space in my life that allows for the possibility of something we can’t see, something that brushes up against or brings us in touch with a benevolent force or higher power. This used to be filled by church involvement– as a parishioner since birth and later as a pastor for 26 years. But lately, I seem to have either lost my way, or awakened on a new path where I question everything, including the existence of God.
Spirituality is very important to me– I need to know that there’s more to this existence than what’s currently meeting the eye. But I’m wondering if it’s always been more a chasing after wind than anything based on some sort of reality.
I’m not looking for a designer spirituality that gets me in touch with some inner… whatever, something that “works for me,” but rather something that satisfies longings, that corroborates theories and feelings, that hints at something bigger than what we get in this earthly life, that feeds the hope that there has to be something more. I thought I had found this in all those years when I considered myself a Christian, but now I’m not so sure. There’s been too much misery and waiting, while the world burns and people vote in useless “leaders.”
I see no reason why such a thing has to be fraught with such mystery, and with strings attached.
I try to exercise regularly, minimize the junk food, and take the medicines my doctor has prescribed. Writing in a journal and here in WordPress helps, too. It’s nice to have an outlet for what’s sloshing about in my head.
In front of one screen or another, checking news and weather, playing Solitaire, looking at photo albums, sometimes reading a book. Other times, I just sit in a comfy chair by a window and gaze out, contemplating life, maybe trying to think of something constructive to do, or another topic for a blog post.
Hmm… having trouble with this one. I’d say Spam, if I still ate that. Maybe it’s more of an olfactory experience. Certain meals– beef stew, for example– emit certain aromas while they’re cooking that take me way back.
It has always been Abraham Lincoln, especially after reading Jon Meacham’s account of his life. Lincoln was the right person for the times, even if he did have his own issues. He was humble, smart, and courageous, unlike the current occupant taking up space in the White House, who is, in sharp contrast, a pompous dumbass.
It was sometime during elementary school, maybe 4th or 5th grade. Her name was Pat. I can’t remember if I ever talked to her.
Japan, South Korea, Canada, Greenland, Iceland, the British Isles, especially Ireland, and the Scandinavian countries– Norway, Sweden, Finland, and Denmark. I’d love to see Machu Picchu, in Peru, along with that spot that has the expanse of shallow water that looks like a mirror and offers amazing views of the sky– Salar de Uyuni, in Bolivia.
And maybe Northern India or Nepal, where I could catch a glimpse of the Himalayas.
I’m already retired, but I wish it could have been with a bit more financial freedom, a bit more wiggle room, instead of looking forward to the end of the month each month. I guess we’re doing OK, in a relative way, but I look around at what other retirees are doing, and realize there’s no way we could do much of anything similar, or at least with such regularity and ease.
A bit of unsolicited advice to all who are still working: enjoy this life along the way, but have a financial plan for when your working days are over– so you can facilitate other hobbies and activities and be happily (and more selectively) occupied and engaged.
Or not… some days it’s looking like the future isn’t all that bright for any of us, so live while you can, and take care of each other.
3 Cents' 