Good question. My father used to ask me, periodically, “So, do you think you’ll ever amount to anything?” I never really hated the question. Maybe I was more confused by it, though I remember usually taking it with a grain of salt, assuming that he was being playful and asking the same thing of my siblings.
I always said Yes, even though I had no plan or little reason for confidence. Besides, whether or not I ever amounted to anything wouldn’t be my question to answer. I came to see this as a reflection of what Dad thought of himself, because of what he perceived as a lack of societally sanctioned “achievements” in his life. He could get down on himself pretty easily, even though to my brothers and sisters and I, he was always the best dad in the world, and loved and respected by everyone around him.
I guess the question I hate most, whether asked outright or insinuated with body language or a glance, is “What are we gonna do today?”– as if every day must have an agenda and a To Do list, as in “Time to get your ass in gear.” I really am annoyed by that, for some reason. The days of being concerned with purposeful busyness have been over for a while.
3 Cents' 