Get Out of Town!

So the US is securing the use of military bases in the Philippines. That’s just the best news!

I mean, isn’t it great to know that we’re moving into position so we can keep an eye on China in case they decide to attack Taiwan? Isn’t that just the greatest piece of news since everyone’s favorite megalomaniac decided to ruin a whole country and challenge the current world order almost a year ago?

It’s the greatest news we could possibly hear amidst all the other great news we try to assimilate every day.

Nothing like a world war to snap us out of our economic funk and general malaise. Woo-hoo!